Tuesday, 25 October 2011

Best Thing I Never Had


Nicki had seen everything that had just went down. When drake spun Jaz around. The Kiss. Nicki eyes started to burn. Milliseconds later Nicki was blinded by her tears, The Rolex watch, with the word 'Drizzy' engraved on the back, that had been put in a dark blue box, with a black tight, neat bow, fell to the sand. Before it even touched the sand Nicki was no longer on the beach.
She unlocked her car, sat inside; she rested her head in the steeling wheel and cried. Suddenly he passenger seat door opened. Now if it was Drake, Nicki most definitely did not want to hear his bullshit. But it wasn't him.....? Or was it?

Chapter 23

Nicki sighed, she was scared, scared of what he was going to say, or even do. He just sat in the car, and stared at her. Looking in to her red eyes. "What do you want?"
"I came to see if you were okay?"
" I am over the moon!" Nicki rolled her eyes.
"Nicki I'm sorry he did that." Nicki side eyed him.
"He is just like YOU! I really know how to pick 'em" there was silence in the car. "Trey what is it you want?"
"You! Seeing you with another guy makes me want you?"
"That Statement right there makes me hate you!" Nicki spat out like venom whilst still in tears and her headache was starting to form, she kept replaying the incident over in her mind.
"Nicki you know I love you. I never stopped loving you..."
"Oh Tremaine I am tired of this love song. You just say anything i wanna hear, and then I buy it, replay it and then eventually get tired of the same song the same guy." Nicki said looking in to Trey's eyes.
"Nicki just hear me out."
"No you hear me out! I am tired, I am sick and I am tired! I have just had one of the worst day of my life and YOU of all people want me back your life. Fuck No! I dislike you so much, it’s close to hate. Looking back on everything we have been through, the bad times, the good times. In some ways I am happy you cheated because not only did it break me. It made me stronger. Plus you were a Shitty boyfriend." Nicki chuckled "I remember when I would tell my girls about how fine you are and how I was going to make you mine. But I am so through with that. Trey was it worth cheating? You couldn't just wait?"
Trey did know what to say, apart from the words "I'm sorry"
"Can you just leave now before anyone comes looking for me. I don't want to see anyone."
"I don't want to leave you alone." Nicki put her head on the steering wheel.
"I will be fine okay please just leave." Nicki didn't even look at him.
"Nicki I don't think it's safe for you to drive home while crying."
"Trust me I will be fine."
"Okay, drive safely." Trey was about to go but then he sat back in the seat. "Nicki I am not leaving, I am going to drive you home. It's not safe."
"Well I am not let you drive my car! Look I will be fine okay. I want to go before Drake realises... Never mind he probably won't. PLEASE JUST GO!"
"Okay don't yell I will go" With that Trey left Nicki car. Nicki wanted to shout and yell and beat him up for getting in her car. But she was hurting. She was hurting really bad. As Nicki pulled out the car park, she looked to her right and saw Drake stand there with Trey. She wiped the tear that escaped her almond shaped eyes.

Nicki cried the whole way home, when Nicki got home she slammed the front and ran up the stairs. "Onika don't be sla..." Her mother stop what she was saying once she came out the kitchen "Onika what's wrong?" At this point Nicki slammed her bedroom slid down the down and cried loudly. Her mother knocked on the door. "Onika let me in baby. You know I am a great listener!" Nicki smiled sheepishly and wiped her tears off her cheek and turned the door handle. Nicki stood up slowly as she opened the door. Once she saw her mother she fell into her arms and cried. "Ssh ssh my little Nika" Her mother stroke the back of her hair. They walked over to the bed. Nicki laid her head on her mommas lap. Carol tucked strands of Nicki hair behind her ear. About 30 minutes later Nicki spoke, "What's wrong with me?" Ms Carol was so confused but she figured this question was going somewhere. "Nothing baby your beautiful on the inside and out"
"Then why do I keep on picking the same guys?"
"Baby What happened?"
"Drake has been cheating me, ma"
"What? Baby Are you sure?"
"Yes Mother I am sure!! Like how could he do this to me."
"Doesn't sound like him." At this point Nicki had sat up.
"Well he show his true colours when he kissed a girl right in front of me. Ma I said I LOVE YOU to him." Nicki was hysterical crying.
"Oh Nika" She cried on her mother's shoulder. Nicki tried to calm down.
"Mama I wanna move back New York!"

"Because of boy trouble you are leaving?"
"Yes Ma'am," Nicki wiped her tears with the palm of her hand and looked at her mom. Her mother knew there was no arguing or telling Nicki otherwise because Nicki would rebel, she was a very stubborn child.
"Well I will let you sleep on it before you make a decision." Ms Carol kissed her wiping daughter forehead. "I love you baby"
"Love you too."
"Oh and Nicki," She looked at her mother "Believe half of what you see and none of what you hear. Good night." On that note Carol left the room.

Nicki took off her swimwear and got into her pyjamas and tuck herself into bed. Every time she closed her eyes Drake would ring her phone. He had been calling her phone since she left beach and now it was just getting annoying. He finally stopped calling and texted her instead.

Hey babe, I don't know what Trey said to you but please forgive him. That was my fault I shouldn't have invited him. I hope you're okay and please don't cried you're too beautiful. I will call you tomorrow. Love you and Thanks for today. ~Drake

She chuckled at the fact that he thought Trey was the reason she crying. Now she was pissed.

Don't call me EVER again. ~ Nicki

What? What's wrong? ~ Drake

If you don't know then is doesn't matter~ Nicki

Huh? I am coming over ~Drake

No you’re not I wanna be alone ~Nicki

Ok I will see you tomorrow then ~Drake


What? Did you just break up with me over text? ~ Drake

Yes Nigga. Now get off my phone!! ~ Nicki

She threw her phone at the wall, and then turned her whole body around so that she was lying on her belly and cried into her pillow. Until sleep took over.

Nicki POV

It was 3am; I had been woken by a knocking on my balcony door. I grabbed my baseball bat that my dad told me to keep under my bed. I slowly walked over to door, and then I opened it to see Drake stand there in the rain. I just stared at him, with my red puffy eyes. I attempted to slam the door in his face but he just walked in my room without saying a word. "Drake its 3am." I said restlessly putting my bat back underneath my bed.

"Nic I want you to say it to my face."

"Say what?"

"We are done!"

"I told you that I wanted to be alone. I am through with you. Why can't you respect my wishes? Ugh How I hate you!" I started attacking with slaps and punches, I repeated the words "I hate you" over and over as I cried trying to convince myself that I hated this guy that broke my heart. Was it working… no not really, I don't think I could EVER hate him, I love him too much. I cried as I pounded my fist against his chest until he grabbed both of my wrist.

"Nicki!?" He pinned me against the wall, I looked down as he wiped my tears. His body was pushed up against mine; my heart was beating super fast. He grabbed both of my arms and raised it above my head. I was breathing heavily as he leaned in and kissed my lips softly. He got into the kissed and loosened his grip; I rested her hands on his shoulders. I was getting turned on, then I quickly realised what Drake did as his squeezed my butt, lightly. I tried to pull away but there was no room I was against the wall. Drake had put his hand on my hips, slowly moving up north to my boobs. I used my hands to push him back. Then I slapped his face."Don't Touch me! Drake I don't wanna be with you, this it's OVER! and I would appreciate it if you left." There were tears in his eyes as I went back to my bed; I pulled the duvet over my head. Then a couple second later I heard my door slam. I just cried. We’re officially over. This hurt way more that when Trey cheated, because I actually love Drake. But why would HE do that to me? Why would he hurt me like that? Why?

*Next Day*

So Amber and Cassie wanna take me out for so retail therapy, but all I wanna do is read magazines and eat junk food. Unfortunately my mother is forcing me out of the house.
Amber came to pick me up at my house with Cassie.
"Barbie where were you yesterday?" she asked as I shut the car door.
"Oh I went home." I said looking out the window. I don't want to talk about yesterday. I could feel the tear trying to escape my eyes.
"Ummm *tears up* I found out Drake been cheating on me."
"Oh I already punched that trick in the nose."
"Wait! What!! Em Noo! You should have punched him in the nose."
"That bitch got what she deserves. Nicki you do know that was Drake's Ex-girlfriend right?"
"Wait what???" I felt my world crumb before me. "So I'm not good enough for him, he had to run back to his ex." I was heated!
"It's his lose Nic." Cassie said. "Anyway let’s get out of this car, and make you feel better!"
"Aww I don't know what would do without you guys." I linked arms with the both of them. "I love you guys"
"Aw Nic we love you too" we hugs in the parking lot.
"Guys I am mad though!" Amber said as we pulled away.
"Lol Why??"
"I didn't get to cut a bitch...”
I laughed so hard, this girl. Smh! "And why not?"
"Cam pulled me back!" she pouted "Dumb Nigga" she mumbled.
"Lol I am glad he did. I don't wanna be visiting your ass in jail."
"Right!" I don't wanna be visiting you in jail! I don't want grown ass women sniffing my hair and acting like chimps." Cassie said laughing and I joined in. Amber gave use both blank stares.
"Anyway let’s go. I need some new Jimmy choo bag to go with the shoes I bought last week." Amber said as we walked in to the mall.
Jimmy choo was the first store on the right. We spend an hour in there. I came out with a CUTE pink handbag from the scarlet collection. Oh it wasn't really pink, just the handle. But it was still cute.

Cassie and Em got the same one as me but just different colours, Cassie got navy blue and Amber got the black one. We went to about 5 different stores before my stomach started growling.
Cassie suggested that we go to Starbucks then shops a little bit more then we go home. I was down for anything.
I ordered a Red Velvet Whoopie pie, Sesame Noodles and a Crème Caramel Frappuccino.

Cassie order the same thing as me but just Tazo Green Tea Crème Frappuccino and a Peanut Butter mini Cupcake

Amber ordered Chicken & Hummus, lemon sweet square and java chip frappucino.

The woman at the counter said it's going to take 10minutes for our food to come. We paid and went to go and sit in the comfy chairs. I swear we had a million bags that occupied the whole area. Smh! "Aye Nic we gotta pee, you stay here and wait with the bags."
Picked up my barbieberry off the table in front of me, to check my messages. Something got a reflection from the sun, it shone in my eye. It was my ring, you know the promise ring Drake gave me. I wanted to cry I am so used to putting it on in the mornings :'( I forgot. I forgot this means nothing to him. It's just another song. Another Bad Love Song, but this time Drake is the one singing it. I took it off and dropped it in my bag. I checked my messages, and then I deleted them all as they were all from Drake. I listened to all of my voicemail. I deleted all 72 of them except one I got at 3:45am.
"Nicki I don't know what I did, but whatever it is please don't leave me. I know you love me because of that kiss. And when I look into those big beautiful brown I see you still love me. But I honestly don't know what I did, please talk to me." I could tell by the sound of his voice he was crying, this made me cry. Amber and Cassie came back and saw me crying.
"Aw Nicki don't cry." Cassie said hugging me.
"Nicki why are you crying baby?" Amber asked me.
"Um Drake left me a voicemail. And he doesn't know why I dumped him."
"Oh you know what you need to talk, not shout or yell just talk to him. He loves you Nic!" Cassie said "And you love him."
"Maybe... Maybe y'all are right, I should stop crying. But I am NOT going to talk to him." Cassie furrowed her brows. I just eat my food that was in front of me.

It was almost time to leave but Cassie and I want to go to two more stores. So we gave Amber the all bags and went back to her car. Cassie and I went our separate ways. I went into Juicy Couture I need a new track suit. I roamed around the store. I found the perfect one but it was green and i wanted black.
"Excuse Me, will you be about to find out if you do this in black?" I asked a tall dark skinned guy with a lip piercing, he had a small Mohawk and he had about five tattoos. So Hot!
"Sure pretty lady for you anything," I giggled, is this dude trying to hit on me Lmao!
"Thank you"

I sat on the Juicy Couture chairs waiting for the sexy guy to come back. There were only a few people in the store, my heart sunk when I heard Jaz's voice. She was talking to Amerie; you know she was one of the actors in my talent show performance.
"Cuz yesterday was hectic" Jaz said I am guessing they are cousins.
"What happened?"
"You know Drake and I have a lot of history. Well yesterday after that psycho Amber or Chloë whatever her fucking name is punched me, Drake and I went to the hospital, then we went back to his house. You know the rest" I almost throw up.
"Jaz you know he has a girlfriend now?"
"Amerie, gwooorl that trick was just there to keep him warm for me, he loves me. He told me so last night. That hoe doesn’t mean shit to him." You know what I didn't care that she was with Drake last night, but this bitch have to stop calling me names.

"Uh excuse me I would appreciate it if you stop calling me names."
"Uh hi Nicki"
"Hi Amerie,"
"Oh your Drake's bitch!" my eyes got wide, did this hoe not hear me the first time. Before it was like whatever, but now it’s personal. I flicked her forehead. "Ow What The FUCK"
"Hoe I told you to quit with the name calling. I rep Southside Jamaica Queen, you can't be calling me names."
"I just did! Bitch, whore, hoe, slut, heffa...." I didn't even let her finish this hoe had a LOT of balls to be calling me, Onika Tanya Maraj names. I tackled her down and punched, slapped, pulled out the two tracks of weave that was in her hair out. Dumb bitch! I told her not to mess with me. As I stood up, the sexy guy came out of the stock room with my black tracksuit. Amerie ran to her cousin helping her up.
"Hi pretty mama, this was the last one. I had to search high and low just for you. Does that mean I can have your number?"
"Mmm Aiden...” I said reading his name tag. "I just literally like less than 24hour ago got out a relationship. So I am not dating."
"Well I mean I still want get to know you."
"Aw okay, only because you got my tracksuit I will let you get to know me." I smiled, he chuckled.
"You have a cute smile." I blushed "Wait this ain't fair, you know my name and I don't know yours." I giggled, this Nigga!
"My name is Onika, but everyone calls me Nicki."
"I like Onika, it suit you, a beautiful name for an even more beautiful girl." He kissed my hand.
"You're so corny!" he chuckled
"yeah I know" I round my eyes; we walked over to the check out. Jaz mean mugged me as I paid for my clothes. I was about to leave when Aiden come up to me, "Onika how am I supposed to get to know you if ain't got your number." I smiled.
"That’s the whole point!" I giggled as he pouted "Aw Aiden I joke, pass your phone" I typed my number in his blackberry, and my name with a heart next to it. "Call me"
"Will do, take care beautiful."

Aw he was adorable, but I am not looking for anyone right now. As I got back to the car Amber gave me the evils. "what?"
"Half an Hour I have been waiting here"
"Sorry but I ran in to Jaz, you know I had to beat that bum bitch down!"
"Oh wow what did she do"
"Bitch was calling me names. I told her ass before to stop, and when she did I beat the shit outta her."
Amber was crying from laughing so hard, "what did she do?"
"What could she do?" We laughed. "I met this hottie Aiden..." Cassie cut me off,
"Wow Gworl you bounce back fast."
"Lol! No it's not like that."
"Mmmhmm sure" Amber mumbled
"No for real, I just broke up with Drake. Seriously yo, I am just looking for a friend"
"Gworl we you're friend, you don't need no man." Amber said starting up the car. I gave her a blank stare.
"But Nicki for real Cassie and I was talking and we want you to know we got your back! And we love you!!"
"Aww I love y'all too"
See now, I don't wanna move back to NY I love my besties too much to leave.
We sang Spice Girls~2Become1 all the way to my house! Retail Therapy IS the best kind of Therapy!

Thank you @TeamMinajPeru for Aiden's name ;)


  1. Smh @ drake not knowing what he did #shameonhim!!!
    Nicki its going to be alright
    And no @ this dude trying holla at nick
    hmm ^_^

  2. *sings* "you've made me stronger by breaking my heart ; you ended my life , and made a better on start :)"

    "Believe half of what you see and none of what you hear. < THAT is really touching!'

    Ew no, what the fuck? NICKI NO!!!!!! NOOOOOOO. Please talk to Drake :( damn.

    but I like the intense ness... Shout out to my girls Amber and Cassie <3.

    Post sooner than later, Ditto :P.

  3. Awwww! Nd she alredy got guys hitting on herr!(: Howw cute): nd he doesnt noo what he did!! Wow! Poor Nick! Things'ss get Better she better not take him back so Soon!! Possst Soonn!!!!!(:

  4. *side stares nicki* now u nooo u need to stop playin cuz u love drake to much just stop it! it wasnt even like that :/